“My Favorite Things” by Julie Andrews

Julie Andrews

To commemorate her birthday, actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan’s Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP.
One of the musical numbers she performed was’My Favorite Things’ from the legendary movie ‘Sound Of Music’.
Here are the lyrics she used:

(Sing It!) 

Botox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Cadillacs and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.

When the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don’t feel so bad.

Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Back pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin’,
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin’,
And we won’t mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things.

When the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I’ve had,
And then I don’t feel so bad.


>>>>>>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>


(Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd that lasted over four minutes, and repeated encores.

Passwords — how to remember? — Mildred’s friend has clever solution

password is incorrect

“Any Key”

Any Key

Texting Codes — for Seniors

Texting Codes for Seniors

Thanks to Robert Plank for sending this to us

Parachute Club’s new member

Parachute

Yesterday my daughter again asked why I didn’t do something useful with my time. Her favorite topic of conversation seems to be talking about my “doing something useful.”

She said she was “only thinking of me” and suggested I go down to the senior center and hang out with the guys.

I did this and when I got home last night I decided to teach her a lesson about staying out of my business. I told her that I had joined a parachute club.

She said, “Are you nuts? You ‘re almost 82 years old and you’re going to start jumping out of airplanes?” I proudly showed her that I even got a membership card.

She said to me, “Good grief, where are your glasses! This is a membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club.”

“I’m in trouble again, and I don’t know what to do . . . I signed up for five jumps a week.” I told her.

She fainted.

Life as a senior citizen isn’t getting any easier but sometimes it can be fun.

Now, finally, the cell phone seniors have been waiting for

Senior Cell Phone

Wrong answer in Health & Safety Course

Fire Safety1111

Are we really to pop out of bed?

Inlineimage5

Pre-marital question, rather intimate

[An oldie goldie, please pardon
us if you’ve already heard it]  

Pre-marital question infrequently

An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time.  Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married.

Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work.  They discussed finances, living arrangements and so on.  Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship.

“How do you feel about sex?,” he asked.

“I would like it infrequently,” she replied.

The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, leaned over towards her and asked, “Is that one word or two?”

Computers: ID ten T error message

Unknown

I had a problem yesterday, so I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over.

Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, ‘So, what was wrong ?

He replied, ‘It was an ID ten T error.’

I didn’t want to appear stupid, but nonetheless enquired,

‘An, ID ten T error ? What’s that? In case I need to fix it again.’

Eric grinned ….’Haven’t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before ?

‘No,’ I replied.

‘Write it down,’ he said, ‘and I think you’ll figure it out.’ ?

So I wrote down:

ID10T

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